Monkeytoes

Yesterday morning was the 20 week ultrasound, and this morning, we met with Edie (midwife). Last week was meetings about the house, and this week, it was meetings about the womb. So far, the house looks like it will cost more, at least all at once. But drawn out over the course of a life, I think that McFetus will wind up costing more in real dollars. Aside from that, the house is in a bit of limbo because of financing, and McFetus is doing really well according to the results of the ultrasound.

This was the moment when I was wondering what would happen to my Firm Resolve not to find out the sex. When asked if I wanted to know, what would my first answer be?

Well, it was "no".

She asked, I said "No".

And I realized that I would have been disappointed had it slipped out or seemed obvious. I don't want to start subconsciously assigning gender roles and expectations; I don't want to be inundated with boy/girl stuff (I don't want to be inundated with Stuff, in general); I don't want to know. We can't change it, and I don't care which it is. I don't see how it matters, anyway. Even if we were decorating a room or buying stuff now, I don't go in for all that pink and blue crap.

If it's a boy, I hope it's like Pete. If it's a girl, I hope it's like Pete.
If it's a boy, I don't want to have it circumcised. If it's a girl, I don't want to have it circumcized.

(We can add on the hope that it has red, curly hair and the hope that it's not tone deaf, but those things are not dependent upon the absence or presence of ovaries or testes).

After all, it has bones and fingers and toes; it has kidneys, a four-chambered heart--pumping away at 162 beats per minute, both halves of a brain, and it weighs about 12 ounces. It's almost a pint!

At one point, when a hand showed up, the technician said "Cute." I find the word "cute" as applied to an ultrasound to be... well, it's not apropos:

1 a: clever or shrewd often in an underhanded manner
b: impertinent, smart-alecky
2: attractive or pretty especially in a childish, youthful, or delicate way
3: obviously straining for effect

Yeah, no. It's not 1a, nor is it 1b. It's not 2, nor is it 3. Were it 1a or 1b, we would be in decided trouble because something that cannot survive on its own would be plotting against me in a sassy manner, the universe would be out of whack. As far as 2 goes, I suppose that some people would say that, yeah, it's "cute", but it's not a correct use of the word. I'll grant you that it would be delicate were it outside of its secure environment, but it's pretty safe in there. As far as being "attractive" or "pretty", those are loaded terms, and, well, it's not either of those things.

Here is a skeleturtle (thanks to Liza for the analogy):
Here's our fetal monkey:
(open mouthed and probably gulping down amniotic fluid, I might add.)

And here, exhibiting the bad habit of sucking either a thumb or a finger:
That's the only one that someone might be able to say was "cute", and even then, they should not say it to me. To me, it is interesting, scientifically amazing (that we can get these images), reassuring, and fascinating. It's also a great way for Pete to get involved and see what is going on in there. It was also cool to see it moving around. As for cute, just remember that it's greasy, covered with hair, and swallowing its own pee. Cute things are generally not like that.