Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Days of Whine and Roses

It appears that some people think we get babywhumpus from day care, bring him home, slap a crown on his head, and let the little prince rule the show.

This is far from the case. He doesn't get his way through whining or demands, which are his two favorite modes of communication at the end of the day. I get it. All I wanted to do yesterday was whine. Or wine. (I beered.) But we don't foster that type of communication by capitulating. We ask him to try again, or we restate that he can whine and have nothing instead of the wonderful thing he wants or we have offered. It usually works, but we are not to the point where he starts out asking nicely more than 50% of the time. I'd be happy with 51% at this point.

I just read that one good tactic to use in response to whining is whispering. The article says that it will help you keep your cool and encourage your child to use the same type of voice. It's also remarkably creepy to whisper in a potentially volatile situation. It can create a strange aura of intensity that is often much more effective than anger or yelling. Yelling rarely helps, although I have found a quick, sharp bark of "FINN" to be useful to cut through the Wall of Whine.

Another suggestion is to designate a "Whine Room" where the tiny person has to go when it whines. I think I would rather be the one isolated, but this is an interesting idea, though probably impractical in a small house that already has a Naughty Chair.

Then there's the Whine Toll, where the kid has to pay every time it whines. This is, of course, money out of my pocket, and I don't think I can afford it, especially considering that he has no real concept of money, and we might have to resort to a Fee-for-Pee system in the Whumpus house.

We can't confuse the real value of money when we are trying to exit diaper land. I think I'd rather have whining than crappy underpants (last night, it was really, really similar to cat barf).

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