Books of the Living Dead

Apparently, there's a Cult of Mommy, and I would argue that there is also a Cult of Pregnancy. Like all cults, there is inductive reading material involved. For the Mommy Cult, everyone seems to get a copy of the sick little tome "Love You Forever." Have you read this piece of supposedly charming propaganda? It's like a stalker manual as well as a recipe for how to raise creepy kids who will definitely need intensive therapy. It's terrifying, and it makes me feel tainted and uncomfortable.

Now I will probably get three hundred copies of it.
Please, think of the trees. We can file this book away with "Dianetics."

The Pregnancy Cult appears to involve "What to Expect When You Are Expecting." This book is everywhere, and everyone has read it. When you go to the parenting section of the bookstore, there are many copies of it, faced out and ready for the purchasing.

I want nothing to do with it.
I did not know why, aside from an aversion to the ubiquitous nature of the book and terrible cover art, but after talking to a couple of friends who had babies and found it to be horrible, I don't think I need more evidence for my initial aversion. Please don't get me one.

Last summer, I bought a copy of "The Complete Organic Pregnancy," and recently, I bought "The Mayo Clinic's Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy," from which the weekly development scans come. I also picked up "Raising Baby Green," which could sound like St. Patrick's Guide to Child Care, but is, of course, for treehuggers like me. I know that a lot of my reading will be pregnancy and baby reading, but I don't want overload. The Mayo Clinic book is informational and smart, and I trust the brand. I guess that they can't write things like "At this point, your blasotcyst..." because most women won't respond positively to that, but all the references to "my baby" are annoying. At this point, I have no baby. I have a blasotcycst that is fast becoming an embryo, and I am the host. I don't resent having to give up alcohol and more closely watch what I put into and onto my body because I am used to that, and it's good for me anyway. Many of them lead me further down the sustainability path and will be good habits to form (the Guinness will be back, though). I am not, however, looking forward to the squealy, squishy, gushy, gurgly congratulations that will come with telling people. It will be too much focused attention on me and too much focused attention on a happenstance which, let's face it, was not all that difficult to accomplish. Fun, but not difficult.

I feel a certain ambivalence to this new change. I am starting a new job. We were going to remodel in the Spring. What about all the places we want to visit? What about us? I love being with Pete. I love the two of us. We won't have that anymore. Pete reminded both of us that we are really good together, and now we are adding to the group, which is true, but everything is going to change. I don't want to be part of the Cult of Mommy.