It's popular knowledge that pregnancy can make you fat and sick.
It was not popular knowledge to me that pregnancy can also make you stupid, stopped up, and smothered in acid.
Oh, and no one told me that brushing my teeth would turn into a blood bath.
The Stupid that I mentioned in an earlier post is not getting any better. Because my expectations for myself have remained unchanged, as has my relative inability to adapt to new circumstances, I am often frustrated when I can't multi-task or understand simple directions. Pete keeps telling me that it's ok, that now I am like any other mortal, but I don't like it. It seems like it takes me twice as long to do everything, and I can be easily set back if I am interrupted. Contributing to The Stupid is the fact that while I am trying to concentrate at work, Squirmy is trying out for the synchronized swimming team.
The stopped-up part of the fun is the (hopefully) every other day pooping. I did not want to have to think about my bowel movements this much. Indeed, I have never really thought about that part of my life because I am not a guy. Clogging the toilet it not ladylike or sexy, and no one really ever wants to hear the words "That's some impressive dookie-making, honey."
Heartburn. Sucks. The papaya extract helps, but for a good part of every day, I feel like I have a small plastic farm animal toy lodged in my throat. It makes me cough, and being bathed in hot stomach acid for hours a day is just plain gross.
I already know that I don't floss enough, and my gums have a tendency to be bleedy, but now... well, it's a good thing that my body is making extra blood because it all seems to be washing down the sink.
I kind of feel like a walking medical experiment.
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